I wrote this the evening we returned from San Antonio, but with my internet down I've been unable to post it... until now.
Be it ever so humble, there's no place like home...
Finally in their own beds, my precious ones sleep; but before joining them I wanted to take a few moments and reflect on the past week...
When we left for San Antonio, I was unsure of God's purpose in sending us. Although mortal man can never fully comprehend the ways of God, I do believe, in retrospect, that this week was a test. And I believe I passed.
From the time I was small, my life has been one of big dreams-- but little action. I love to plan, to devise, to scheme; but I don't work diligently at the details. This is something I have repeatedly excused as not pertaining to my personality, (I'm not a detailed person) but God calls us to be faithful in the little things and not to despise the day of small beginnings.
When I was terrified on Monday morning and overwhelmed to the point of tears, I believe it was because I finally met people who were accomplishing the things of which I have merely dreamed. But instead of being daunted by that fact, my beloved husband encouraged me to use the opportunity to learn all I can from those who do know what they're doing.
Further complicating the week was the fact that my family came with me on my trip. I wanted them there. But as a potential film maker, I also needed to network with other film makers. For the entire week, my attention was torn. If you ask my Mom, she'll tell you that I have always wanted to be where the action was. When something was happening, that's where I could be found. But this trip was different. As much as I enjoyed the Academy and the Film Festival, in truth I wanted to be with my family, because I truly wanted to share the experiences of the week with them. The night before the Film Festival started, we had planned to go out to eat, but all three of the girls were sick. I was not disappointed like I would have been in the past. Instead, it was joy to spend the evening loving and nurturing them.
The rest of the week was insane, as Thom and I tried to juggle the care of 3 sick girls and the movies that we each wanted to see. But I truly delighted in the time spent with my family and I realize anew that my place is with them. That doesn't mean that we won't make a film. I hope we do. But I think I finally got my priorities right. My identity is not found in my drama class, or my productions, or any film that we may possibly make some day; rather my identity is in Christ, so I am thrilled to be right where He wants me-- at HOME.
|I am so thankful my family could share this with me!|
Meanwhile, we will continue to pray for His guidance and seek His wisdom regarding the possibility of making films. There is still so much I want to share with you...